I might have been on drugs the day I got married.
Okay, okay... maybe that isn't true. But I felt like I was. It was truly the most surreal day of my life--sort of like sitting in a quadruple 3D domed imax theatre with all sorts of fancy things like a screen that talks back to you and scent-sprayers in the wall that make the experience authentic even to your nostrils (I've been campaigning for these through Food Network for years). I watched it all happen around me. Attempting to savor every moment. Every surprise.
It wasn't until the moment my husband flashed his butt at the crowd that I was jerked into the reality of the moment. You see, years and years before we ever even met, I had attended a wedding where the bride and groom had read love letters to each other at the altar before they exchanged vows. It was so... beguiling. I was hooked. My poor husband didn't know when he proposed that I'd soon call on him to be Shakespeare for a day.
Like any good English major, I wrote, edited, brainstormed, revised, scratched out, wrote some more, edited, and finally finalized my letter after months of ink-stained hands and carpal tunnel problems. In my mind, it was the "Pièce de résistance" in my wedding-day plot to finally see my man shed a tear. However, when I concluded my letter at the altar with a sweet, but admittedly humorous reference to his nickname--I was surprised by the immense amount of laughter that was being emitted by our guests. I mean come on, I wasn't THAT funny--was I?
It wasn't until I looked up from my letter that I realized that they weren't laughing at the onscreen me, but were instead laughing at the very real man standing across from me, bent over, coattails up, hind end bared.
Okay... maybe not BARED (he kept his pants on)... but it was enough to make my very pale skin very hot pink.
Apparently, "honeybottom" (a nickname I had come up for him in response to him once calling my 'sugarbritches') wasn't the best way to end my tear-jerker of a letter. But I was happy to get a laugh. And even more happy to have a husband that could surprise me with his own laughter inducing antics--even at the altar. What joy to my soul.
Growing up, my mom always told me to marry someone that both inspired and intrigued me. This story is a testament to the fact that I did just that. (Kids, listen to your moms... they know their stuff.)
Now, being nearly 10 months hitched, we have decided to make a plan for the new year that will hopefully further create opportunities to inspire and intrigue each other. I'll post details of this plan soon. Until then, just sit back and relax in those imaginary quadruple 3D domed imax theatre seats... Coming from one of those most naturally impatient people on the planet... I promise not to leave you hanging too long.